


kiss me in the dark

by tiigi



Series: making music of our own [3]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, M/M, Praise Kink, alternative universe, ethan is a fan, rockstar mark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:53:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24971869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tiigi/pseuds/tiigi
Summary: “Hi there,” Mark says, drawing a few dirty looks from passers by. Ethan looks around like he can’t quite believe this is happening, and Mark has to laugh. “Funny seeing you here. You never called me.”Ethan kicks away from the wall. “You never called me,” He replies, which is fair.
Relationships: Mark Fischbach/Ethan Nestor
Series: making music of our own [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1783612
Comments: 24
Kudos: 199





	kiss me in the dark

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like it’s important to say what with everything going on at the moment: this really is just fiction for fun. Relationships like this in real life could have a dangerous power dynamic and I wouldn’t want anyone to think that this was trying to undermine those dangers <3

In all honesty, Mark doesn’t think about it until he’s already at home. He gets to sleep in his own bed so rarely that whenever he knows it’s happening, he can’t think about anything else for weeks leading up to it. Tour had been incredible, of course, but also stressful and tiring, and Mark feels ready to sleep for a thousand years. 

And then he gets home and starfishes out onto his bed and instantly remembers what happened the last time he was here. It’s been months, and there’s no way he isn’t imagining it, but he could swear that the sheets still smell like sex.

He remembers Ethan. He remembers the way he blushed and laughed at Mark’s jokes and looked at him like he hung the moon. Mark remembers that being a nice feeling, while it lasted.

It’s been ages since they spoke. They exchanged a few texts right after their night together: Ethan sent him a brief message to wish him luck for his next show, and Mark thanked him. He’d been stressed and busy at the time and Ethan had never replied. He hopes that has more to do with the boy’s nerves than a lack of interest.

But now he’s here, and Ethan is here too, somewhere. He should have asked for Ethan’s address when he had the chance, should have found out where he worked, because now he has no hope of just… casually running into him.

Is he really going to reach out for the first time in months just to ask Ethan if he wants to hook up again? Will the boy even remember him?

Well, Mark doubts he’d forget given the way he acted last time, but he’s still anxious. It’s hard not to worry, even when he knows he’s being irrational. 

He has to scroll to the bottom of his messages to find Ethan’s name, hidden amongst Mark’s other contacts. He hesitates before opening it; looking at it now, his perfunctory ‘thank you’ message seems so much harsher than before. Of course Ethan never messaged him back. He probably thought Mark didn’t want him to.

It’s hard for Mark to admit that yeah, actually, he really wanted him to.

Before he can second guess himself any more, he types out a message and sends it quickly.

‘ _Are you working tonight?’_

He tells himself he won’t sit around and wait for a reply, he’s not that lonely or desperate, but finds himself unable to look away. It turns out that he doesn’t have to wait a long time anyway. Within a few minutes, three dots flash up in a bubble to show that Ethan is responding. They appear and disappear a few times - as though he keeps changing his mind on what to say - before Mark gets a reply.

‘ _Hey! I think you meant to send this to someone else, sorry :)’_

Mark snorts. He can see why Ethan thought that, but he should also definitely be more confident and stop apologising for what he thought was Mark’s mistake. Jesus, what is it about this kid that has Mark feeling so at ease? It happened the first time they were together and it’s happening again now, after just one message exchanged. It’s a lot easier to reply after that.

_‘Gosh, if you don’t want to hang out with me you can just say :(‘_

‘ _I’m just kidding, fyi. Are you free to meet up?’_

Ethan is silent for a long time after that, and Mark gets nervous again. His leg starts jittering up and down with pent up energy. He forces himself to look away from his phone and take a shower, because he stinks and it’s been far too long since he had this much privacy. His phone can wait. Ethan’s maybe-response can wait. Totally…

Of course he ends up diving for his phone as soon as he hears it beep, even though he’s got a towel wrapped around his waist and his fingers are still wet. He struggles to get his phone open and then struggles to reply once he’s read Ethan’s message.

‘ _Yeah I’m free!!’_

_‘Well I’m working rn sorry should have started with that lol’_

‘ _But my shift ends at 9 so I’m free from then!!’_

Mark snorts. Even just through his messages, Mark can tell that Ethan is pretty much exactly the same as he was before. It’s reassuring - like a little reminder that not everything has changed, that Mark doesn’t need to be so worried all the time. 

_‘Very smooth.’_ He types. _‘Text me the address and I’ll come pick you up?’_

He doesn’t have to wait long for Ethan to reply.

***

The first time they met, he had no idea where Ethan worked. He remembers him saying that he worked for his mother but he didn’t provide any more information than that and Mark didn’t ask. He didn’t want to pry. After all, they didn’t really know each other at all.

They don’t know each other any better now, but Mark hasn’t spent time with anyone other than his bandmates in months and he’s lost all sense of normalcy. He doesn’t know what’s changed in Ethan’s life these past few months, but he figures he can find out soon enough.

Ethan gives him the address to a high class restaurant about a fifteen minute drive from Mark’s house. Mark’s been there a few times, mostly before he was well known enough to get recognised out in public, but he knows it’s a nice place. The people going will be rich, and the people working there will probably be desperate to keep up appearances.

So of course he has to mess with Ethan a little bit. It’s been months since he last saw the guy– he has to retest his sense of humour. Obviously.

So he takes his motorbike. And if he maybe throws on a leather jacket just to look cool, just to impress Ethan, who could blame him?

Ethan is already waiting outside by the time he arrives. His bike slows to a stop by the side of the road and the tires squeal against the tarmac. Ethan looks up from his phone at the sound and his eyes widen when he sees Mark, taking his helmet off and shaking his hair out.

He’s just as beautiful as Mark remembers. It’s hot outside, and his cheeks are slightly flushed, hair neatly combed for work. He’s dressed in black slacks and a white button up shirt, sleeves rolled up in the heat. Mark wants to put his hands on him already.

“Hi there,” Mark says, drawing a few dirty looks from passers by. Ethan looks around like he can’t quite believe this is happening, and Mark has to laugh. “Funny seeing you here. You never called me.”

Ethan kicks away from the wall. “You never called _me,”_ He replies, which is fair. Mark never even thought, until now, to take the first step.

“You have a good shift?” 

“Why am I not surprised that you drive a motorbike?” Ethan replies, ignoring Mark’s question. He’s smiling but Mark doesn’t miss the way his eyes dart nervously between Mark and the bike.

“You ever ridden one before?” He asks.

“Nope. How likely am I to die?”

“It’s always a possibility, kid. You gonna get on or am I gonna have to convince you?”

Ethan cocks his head. “Convince me,” He says, grinning. “Sell it to me. I wanna know what I’m getting myself into.”

Mark leans back against his bike and crosses his arms over his chest. He doesn’t miss the way Ethan’s eyes are drawn to his biceps, and he appreciates the ego boost. 

“Alright then,” he says. “How about this. I take you home - and we don’t die, in case you were wondering. Are you hungry? I could make you a sandwich. Then we can spend all night doing crossword puzzles I missed when I was on tour.”

“Damn.” Ethan clicks his fingers. “That’s not gonna work. I’ve already done all those crossword puzzles. They’re the highlight of my week, y’know?”

“Fun gap year you’re having.” It’s been so long since Mark has been able to have this fun, teasing back and forth with anybody. He tries to remember the last time it happens but all he can think about it Ethan the last time they met, sitting in that diner late at night and watching him eat. His heart pangs. “Guess we’ll just have to find something else to do then, huh?”

Ethan swallows, and Mark watches the bob of his throat up and down. “Got any ideas?” He asks.

Giddy laughter builds up inside Mark’s chest. This feels so surreal - flirting like this on a street corner in a way he probably hasn’t done since high school. Ethan must know what he’s thinking, because he covers his face with his hands briefly and giggles.

“Jesus,” he says. “Am I really gonna have to get on the back of that?”

“I know what I’m doing,” Mark says. “Just hold onto me and don’t let go, and you’ll be fine.” When Ethan still looks hesitant, Mark rolls his eyes and beckons him over. He takes his helmet from where it was hanging from the bike’s handle and fits it over Ethan’s head. Ethan stays still as Mark adjusts it, tilting his face gently to the side.

“There,” Mark murmurs, startlingly close to Ethan’s mouth now. “Happy?”

“Happier,” Ethan says. That’s probably the best that Mark’s going to get.

***

Ethan clings to Mark’s waist the entire drive home. If it was anyone else, Mark would probably find it annoying, but there’s something hopelessly endearing about the way Ethan’s hands play with the strings of Mark’s hoodie, the way the helmet digs into Mark’s back that tells him Ethan’s face is pressed to his body. By the time they get back to Mark’s house, he might have bruises with how tight Ethan is holding onto him.

“There.” When Mark parks up outside his house, he has to pry Ethan’s hands off him. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

Ethan’s voice is shaky when he replies. “I can’t fucking walk, oh my _god.”_

Mark laughs harder than he’d like to admit. He watches Ethan take a few stumbling steps forward, all shaking legs and cute clumsiness like a baby deer, before he goes to help, wrapping an arm around Ethan’s waist and pulling him close. This might be the smoothest Mark has ever been.

“Is this what you’re like when you’re drunk?” Mark asks, and then continues along that same line of thought. “Hey, are you old enough to drink now?”

“I’ve always been old enough to drink, Mark.” Ethan looks so pleased with himself that Mark has to suppress a smile.

“Alright,” he says. “Will I get in trouble if I give you a drink?”

“I won’t tell if you don’t…” 

“Jesus Christ, you’re not making this easy, are you?” Mark has to laugh. “I’m trying to ask how old you are, dumbass.” He pinches Ethan’s side and his heart flutters at the indignant squeak Ethan makes in response.

He’s silent for a long moment, and Mark begins to wonder if maybe he took the joke too far, maybe he overestimated how close they are, how much leeway he has to make jokes like that–

“I’m twenty,” Ethan says suddenly, and when Mark glances over at him he finds Ethan already watching him with a fond expression. “Just so you know.”

Mark nods, casual and dismissive, like he’s not grateful for this new piece of information, like he doesn’t want to get to know him any better. “Okay,” he says. “Cool.”

Ethan never really got a tour of the house last time he was here, so when they get inside he hesitates in the doorway, like he’s waiting for Mark to take the lead. Mark places a hand on the small of Ethan’s back and urges him inside, into the kitchen.

“Do you have a change of clothes or something?” Mark asks, taking two mugs from the cupboard next to him. Ethan has just finished a long shift and hopefully he’ll appreciate a hot chocolate.

“What, you don’t like what I’m wearing?” Ethan says it as a joke, but Mark can hear the faint underlying insecurity. He turns with a fond smile.

“Course I do,” he says. He has to bypass Ethan to get to the microwave, and the sudden closeness has Ethan swallowing, wide eyed. As their drinks warm up, Mark steps close to Ethan again and fiddles with the top button of his dress shirt. 

“You do?” Ethan asks softly, looking up at Mark from under his eyelashes. The helmet has messed up his neatly styled hair and now his fringe flops over his forehead freely. Mark brushes it out of his eyes.

“Mmm, yeah. I think you’d look sexy in anything. Out of it, too.” The base of Ethan’s throat is exposed and Mark just wants to peel away the shirt, reveal more of the boy’s skin like a blank canvas. Mark wants to bite a bruise into him. His fingertips ghost over Ethan’s neck and there’s nothing stopping him from just leaning in and tasting the sweat on Ethan’s skin.

 _Ethan_ wants him to. His eyes are heavy lidded and his breathing is shallow and he’s pressed up against the wall with Mark practically caging him in. When did that happen? Mark can’t remember, but he doesn’t care. Right now Ethan is all he can think about. He can barely fucking breathe with how badly he wants him–

The microwave beeps, loud and obnoxious in the silence that’s settled around them. Mark jerks back suddenly and Ethan’s eyes fly open, startled. He looks so comically cute like that that Mark starts to laugh.

“You asshole,” Ethan giggles, breathless. “Did you plan that?”

“How the hell could I have planned that?”

“I wouldn’t put it past you.” Ethan narrows his eyes. Mark has the ridiculous urge to reach over and boop his nose. Luckily he’s saved that embarrassment thanks to the drink he has in each hand. 

“Seriously though,” Mark slaps Ethan’s hands away when he makes a grab for the drink. It’s too hot– he’d burn himself. “If you want to change out of those clothes, you can borrow some of mine. I have sweatpants and stuff in my room upstairs.”

“Are you just trying to get me up to your bedroom?” Ethan grins, sounding faux outraged.

“Drat,” Mark tuts. “My elaborate plan, foiled again. However will I cope?”

“Mmm, you’ll be fine.” Ethan steps closer and Mark’s hands fall automatically to his waist, curling around his hip bones. He pets over the top of Ethan’s thigh through his trousers. “You don’t have to convince me to go to bed with you.”

God, Mark is fucking breathless. With almost no prompting, other than Ethan’s flirty one liners, he’s hard in his pants and he’s desperate to get his hands on Ethan. He’s blind with want, fingernails leaving crescent shaped marks on Ethan’s skin where he’s squeezing too tight. He wants Ethan _so much–_

“Do you wanna watch a movie?” Mark blurts out, panicked and sudden. Ethan blinks, surprised, before he steps away with a shrug.

“Sure,” He says, happy to go along with it. “What did you have in mind?”

***

They end up watching some action movie that Mark has seen about a hundred times. Ethan doesn’t seem to be paying much attention to it, even though he picked it out. Instead, Mark can feel Ethan watching him intently throughout even the most dramatic scenes. 

Maybe he’s wondering what the fuck Mark’s deal is. Mark doesn’t really know himself. Ethan had been right there and he’d been so pretty and Mark had just… panicked.

He had thought, in that moment, that he didn’t want Ethan to think this was just about sex. Even though it totally is.

Totally…

 _“What?”_ Mark faces Ethan with both eyebrows raised expectantly. Ethan blushes, caught off guard, and hastily looks back to the TV. When he hears Mark snickering he scowls.

“Shut up!”

“What, were you thinking about how beautiful I am?” 

“No, I was actually thinking about how ugly you are.” 

“Oh, really?” Mark laughs. The film is well and truly forgotten now, background noise only. 

When Ethan replies, his voice is a lot softer and a lot more serious than Mark had been anticipating. “No,” he says. “I was actually wondering if you really just invited me over to watch a movie.”

Mark swallows, mouth suddenly dry. “You have something else in mind?” They’re moving closer to each other. Mark is barely aware that they’re doing it but all of a sudden Ethan is right there, right next to him, warm and real and so much better than the people Mark hooked up with before and he doesn’t even know _why._

“Kinda,” Ethan murmurs. His eyes flick down to Mark’s lips and that’s it– that’s all he can take. Mark leans forward and cups Ethan’s cheek; he kisses him, mouth open, licks into Ethan’s mouth and tastes his tongue. It’s addictive and Mark is hard, already fighting the urge to stroke himself through his jeans. 

“Fuck,” Mark breathes. Ethan takes the opportunity to kiss down his neck. “Do you– do you wanna go upstairs?”

“Nuh uh.” Ethan shakes his head. He says, “Wanna– wanna do something. Right here.” And then he slides to the floor, on his knees between Mark’s legs.

His hands shake when they pull at Mark’s jeans. Mark has to lift his ass off the couch to help Ethan get his jeans and boxers off, and then Ethan sits back on his heels and swallows, nervous.

“Ethan,” Mark says, even though he’s so turned on he can barely think. “You don’t have to do–”

“Oh my god, shut up.” Ethan whines. He reaches out and takes Mark’s dick in his hand. It’s so sudden and unexpected that Mark’s entire body jerks, and his fingers dig into the couch cushion. He gives a few more curious, tentative strokes before he leans forward and takes Mark into his mouth.

It’s so much. Everything is just overwhelming: he has a gorgeous twink between his legs, sucking him off like he’s desperate for it. It’s been so long since Mark last did anything like this - he’s had a few hook ups here and there, but mostly it’s been his own right hand. Besides, there’s something about Ethan that makes it special. Mark doesn’t know what it is, and maybe he’s delirious with Ethan’s mouth, warm and wet, wrapped around his cock, but right now Mark could swear that this is the best moment of his fucking life.

“Fuck,” he groans, watching Ethan’s head bob up and down. “You’re doing so fucking good, baby.” 

Ethan whimpers, even with his mouth full, and curls his tongue over the head of Mark’s cock like a thank you. Mark rests his hand on Ethan’s head and clenches his hand around a fistful of Ethan’s hair. He doesn’t tug or try to control anything, just holds it as Ethan does his thing, but he likes knowing that he could if he wanted to.

Ethan must like that too, because his eyes squeeze shut and the hand that was previously stroking the base of Mark’s dick disappears between his own legs. 

The fact that he’s too turned on to wait, too hard to think clearly, gets to Mark. His orgasm is suddenly so close and he gasps. Maybe he means to warn Ethan, to tell him to pull off, but it hits him before he can and he hunches over Ethan’s head, holding him down as he comes.

Mark’s hand slips from Ethan’s hair, exhausted, and Ethan pulls off looking dazed. His lips are shiny, smeared with spit and come, and his pupils are blown wide. He must have swallowed, Mark realises, and that’s the hottest fucking thing.

“So good,” Mark is saying, not quite in control of himself yet. “You’re so good, baby, come here.” He holds out a hand and Ethan takes it, pulling himself to his feet only to fall into Mark’s lap seconds later. He’s straddling Mark’s thigh, his dick hard under his clothes, and he whines when he presses his face into the crook of Mark’s neck.

When Ethan comes, he bites down on Mark’s shoulder hard enough to leave a bruise. Mark cups the back of his neck and holds him through it, only loosening his grip when Ethan slumps to the side and splays out on the sofa, flat on his back.

“Okay,” Mark says. “Now you’re _really_ gonna have to borrow some clothes. Are you staying the night?”

Ethan lifts his head up to squint at Mark. “You think I’m gonna get the subway looking like this? There’s come drying in my underwear, Mark.” He winces.

“You could still borrow some clothes, y’know,” Mark says slowly, tentatively. “You could bring them back tomorrow, if you’d rather not stay. That would be fine.”

“Tomorrow?” Ethan shuffles closer and lays his head in Mark’s lap, looking up at him. Instinctively, Mark’s hands come up to play with his hair.

“Yeah. I’m not on tour anymore, so… I’m gonna be around a lot more often. If you’re– bored, or anything.”

After a moment’s pause, Ethan takes Mark’s hand and presses it to his face. Mark can feel Ethan’s smile against his palm. 

“Yeah,” Ethan says. “I’d like that.”

“That’s what you said about calling me.” Mark grins, laughing when Ethan bites his knuckle.

“You never called me either!” He defends himself, and then groans. “You’re never gonna shut up about that, are you?”

Mark traces Ethan’s smile with his thumb. “We’ll see,” he says. 

**Author's Note:**

> This will probably be the last fic in this series, at least for a while. I’ve got so many ideas and I’m worried that I’ll never get round to writing any of them if I don’t focus :’)
> 
> Thank you to everyone that read and enjoyed this! <3


End file.
